Motivational Quote's

“Your career isn’t always linear,” he said. “But what matters is how well you get back on the horse.”
-Jack Welch

More from Dilbert

If you can't convince them, confuse them.

Smile, it makes people wonder what you are thinking.

Born free taxed to death.

If you tell a man there are 300 billion stars in the universe, he'll believe you. But if you tell him a park bench has just been painted, he has to touch it to be sure.

Freedom's just another word for not caring about the quality of your work!

Would you want career advice from somebody who has to work hard?

I've classified the bugs by severity: 1) lethal, 2) boneheaded, 3) vexing.

Page one of the employee manual. -- "Job satisfaction is the same as stealing from the company."

We've minimized the economic impact of the defects via an advanced business process called "Hoping Nobody Notices."

Never listen to your customers. They were dumb enough to buy your product, so they have no credibility.

I've added mumbling and peevishness to my work-avoidance arsenal. I get the benefits of appearing knowledgeable without the burden of sharing.

Man-duh-tory

I love my coworkers, until they talk.

You're not allowed to lie, but I expect plenty of omissions, misdirections, exaggerations, unjustified optimism, lost documents, unclear explanations, gray areas and tactical ignorance.

I always wondered what efficiency looked like.

Now if you'll excuse me, I feel a nap coming on.

If you hire me, I will use my enormous brain to develop world-changing products. I require no pay and no cubicle. I will eat used paper, and cling to the ceiling.

Sometimes I have naughty thoughts during work hours. Should I reimburse the company for lost productivity?

Can a business-led project management process optimize our strategic core issues?

It's his own fault for not paying me enough to afford entertainment.

Do you want the simple but misleading explanation or the one you won't understand?

How about a nanotechnology stem cell for fighting terrorists?

My philosophy is that anything worth doing is worth delaying.

Once you embrace the idea that your customers deserve to die... it frees your mind to invent splendidly profitable products.

Your biggest defect continues to be your inability to handle criticism. And you argue with people who are much smarter than yourself.

Call me shallow, but I enjoy getting paid for other people's inventions.

My philosophy is that anything worth doing is too hard

Friends, yeh hai zindagi,

Long time back this came as forward.....thought like posting it :)

Friends, yeh hai zindagi,
Requirements hai to design hai
Design hai to Development hai
Development hai to Testing hai
Testing hai to Defects hai
Defects hai to Fixing hai
Fixing hai to More Defects hai
Defects hai to Analysis hai
Analysis hai to Requirements hai
Requirements hai to Design hai
Design hai to Development hai
Matlab Project Gol Gol hai
Bus ghumnewala chahiye..
Some thing similar to this...........

Zindagi Hai To Khwaab Hai
Khwaab Hai To Manzilein Hai
Manzilein Hai To Fasaley Hai
Fasaley Hai To Rastey Hai
Rastay Hai To Mushkilein Hai
Mushkilein Hai To Hausla Hai
Hausla Hai To Vishawas Hai
Vishvas hai to Paisa hai
Paisa hai to Shohrat hai
Shohrat hai to Izzat Hai
Izzat hai to Ladki hai
Ladki hai to Tension hai
Tension hai to Concern hai
Concern hai to a Khayaal hai
Khayaal hai to Khwaab hai
Khawab hai to Growth hai
Growth hai to Zindagi hai
Zindagi hai to khwaab hai
Matlab duniya Gol Gol hai
Bas ghumnewala chahiye......

!! Beautifull Nature !!

Breithorn Peak (switzerland )


The Beauty of the Desert


Blue Sea


Lavender Farm and Tree



Edge of Glacier

Golden Maple Leaf


Beauty of Tibet




View of Holland

!! Beatifull Nature !!

German's New Swan Castle



Scenery of Europe



The beauty of Antarctica




Autumn in Germany



Tundra

Cherry bloom in Japan

!! Taj Mahal !!

!! Beautifull Sunset !!

24 things in IT industry

1.) U use phrases like "No issues" and "Value addition" in everyday parlance. For e.g. When talking about your doodhwalla, U say, "His milk does zero value addition to my health but he is the only guy around so no issues"
2.) Ur prime source of entertainment is the forwards send to U by friends whose faces U cant remember.
3.) U drink more tea or coffee than water.
4.) When a half-day at work means leaving at 7:30 in the evening (and U actually feel guilty about it).
5.) U keep trying to shut down ur home computer by pressing Ctrl+Alt+Del (used to lock office comps)
8.) When ur mobile rings at home, U rush outside to receive the call.
9.) When U make calls at home, U accidentally dial "0" to get an outside line.
10.) U havent played Solitaire with real cards in years.
11.) U tell everyone your favourite book is "Who Moved my Cheese?" when in reality U couldnt even finish that. Ur real favourite book is the Oracle manual for PL/SQL.
12.) Ur last crush was a girl in HR, ur current crush is the new girl in HR and all ur crushes in the future will be girls in HR.
13.) U secretly visit sites like *shaadi.com* <http://shaadi.com/ and hope no one is watching, especially that girl in HR.
14.) U dont go abroad anymore, but go 'on site'. And when U go 'on site' your mama, chacha and l'il cousin Chintu come to see u off.
15.) U spend the entire day reading forwards, smoking cigarettes, drinking tea/coffee and playing T.T. and then complain about the late working hours.
16.) Ur important 'meetings' usually comprise two or three people max, including yourself.
17.) U keep pressing Ctrl+Enter wondering why your gmail is not going.
18.) Ur prime source of sleazy entertainment is the Femina issues in the office library.
20.) U secretly prepare for CAT only to find ur PL sitting behind you at the exam.
21.) Ur criteria for visiting a restaurant is whether it accepts 'Ticket restaurant' coupons or 'Sodhexo' passes.
22.) U email ur mate who works at the desk next to U.
23.) U read this list and kept nodding & smiling.
24.) As U read this list, U r thinking of sending it to ur friends who are also in IT.

HandsFree at its best -Dilbert!

!! It's all done, I won't Stay !!

One of a gud friend of mine Vikram forwarded this to me. It's too good for not to be posted on blog... :)


The name is good, the brand is big
But the work I do is that of a pig
The work or the brand, what is my way?
I dont know if I should stay.

To work, they have set their own way
Nobody will care to hear what I say
My will be NULL, they wont change their way
I dont know if I should stay.

The project is in a critical stage
But to do good work, this is the age
This dilemma is killing me day by day
I dont know if I should stay.

The money is good, the place is great
But the development is at a very small rate
Should I go for the work, or wait for pay
I dont know if I should stay.


The managers dont know what they talk
The team doesnt know where they walk
That's a bad situation, what say?
I dont know if I should stay.

I can go to any other place
But what if I get the same disgrace
I cant keep switching day by day
I dont know if I should stay.

The -ves are more, the +ves are less
Then why have this unnecessary mess
No more will I walk their way,
Its all done, I won't ....

You've got to find what you love

'You've got to find what you love,' Jobs says

This is the text of the Commencement address by Steve Jobs, CEO of Apple Computer and of Pixar Animation Studios, delivered on June 12, 2005.

I am honored to be with you today at your commencement from one of the finest universities in the world. I never graduated from college. Truth be told, this is the closest I've ever gotten to a college graduation. Today I want to tell you three stories from my life. That's it. No big deal. Just three stories.

The first story is about connecting the dots.
I dropped out of Reed College after the first 6 months, but then stayed around as a drop-in for another 18 months or so before I really quit. So why did I drop out?

It started before I was born. My biological mother was a young, unwed college graduate student, and she decided to put me up for adoption. She felt very strongly that I should be adopted by college graduates, so everything was all set for me to be adopted at birth by a lawyer and his wife. Except that when I popped out they decided at the last minute that they really wanted a girl. So my parents, who were on a waiting list, got a call in the middle of the night asking: "We have an unexpected baby boy; do you want him?" They said: "Of course." My biological mother later found out that my mother had never graduated from college and that my father had never graduated from high school. She refused to sign the final adoption papers. She only relented a few months later when my parents promised that I would someday go to college.

And 17 years later I did go to college. But I naively chose a college that was almost as expensive as Stanford, and all of my working-class parents' savings were being spent on my college tuition. After six months, I couldn't see the value in it. I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life and no idea how college was going to help me figure it out. And here I was spending all of the money my parents had saved their entire life. So I decided to drop out and trust that it would all work out OK. It was pretty scary at the time, but looking back it was one of the best decisions I ever made. The minute I dropped out I could stop taking the required classes that didn't interest me, and begin dropping in on the ones that looked interesting.

It wasn't all romantic. I didn't have a dorm room, so I slept on the floor in friends' rooms, I returned coke bottles for the 5¢ deposits to buy food with, and I would walk the 7 miles across town every Sunday night to get one good meal a week at the Hare Krishna temple. I loved it. And much of what I stumbled into by following my curiosity and intuition turned out to be priceless later on. Let me give you one example:

Reed College at that time offered perhaps the best calligraphy instruction in the country. Throughout the campus every poster, every label on every drawer, was beautifully hand calligraphed. Because I had dropped out and didn't have to take the normal classes, I decided to take a calligraphy class to learn how to do this. I learned about serif and san serif typefaces, about varying the amount of space between different letter combinations, about what makes great typography great. It was beautiful, historical, artistically subtle in a way that science can't capture, and I found it fascinating.

None of this had even a hope of any practical application in my life. But ten years later, when we were designing the first Macintosh computer, it all came back to me. And we designed it all into the Mac. It was the first computer with beautiful typography. If I had never dropped in on that single course in college, the Mac would have never had multiple typefaces or proportionally spaced fonts. And since Windows just copied the Mac, its likely that no personal computer would have them. If I had never dropped out, I would have never dropped in on this calligraphy class, and personal computers might not have the wonderful typography that they do. Of course it was impossible to connect the dots looking forward when I was in college. But it was very, very clear looking backwards ten years later.

Again, you can't connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something - your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.

My second story is about love and loss.
I was lucky – I found what I loved to do early in life. Woz and I started Apple in my parents garage when I was 20. We worked hard, and in 10 years Apple had grown from just the two of us in a garage into a $2 billion company with over 4000 employees. We had just released our finest creation - the Macintosh - a year earlier, and I had just turned 30. And then I got fired. How can you get fired from a company you started? Well, as Apple grew we hired someone who I thought was very talented to run the company with me, and for the first year or so things went well. But then our visions of the future began to diverge and eventually we had a falling out. When we did, our Board of Directors sided with him. So at 30 I was out. And very publicly out. What had been the focus of my entire adult life was gone, and it was devastating.

I really didn't know what to do for a few months. I felt that I had let the previous generation of entrepreneurs down - that I had dropped the baton as it was being passed to me. I met with David Packard and Bob Noyce and tried to apologize for screwing up so badly. I was a very public failure, and I even thought about running away from the valley. But something slowly began to dawn on me – I still loved what I did. The turn of events at Apple had not changed that one bit. I had been rejected, but I was still in love. And so I decided to start over.

I didn't see it then, but it turned out that getting fired from Apple was the best thing that could have ever happened to me. The heaviness of being successful was replaced by the lightness of being a beginner again, less sure about everything. It freed me to enter one of the most creative periods of my life.

During the next five years, I started a company named NeXT, another company named Pixar, and fell in love with an amazing woman who would become my wife. Pixar went on to create the worlds first computer animated feature film, Toy Story, and is now the most successful animation studio in the world. In a remarkable turn of events, Apple bought NeXT, I retuned to Apple, and the technology we developed at NeXT is at the heart of Apple's current renaissance. And Laurene and I have a wonderful family together.

I'm pretty sure none of this would have happened if I hadn't been fired from Apple. It was awful tasting medicine, but I guess the patient needed it. Sometimes life hits you in the head with a brick. Don't lose faith. I'm convinced that the only thing that kept me going was that I loved what I did. You've got to find what you love. And that is as true for your work as it is for your lovers. Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven't found it yet, keep looking. Don't settle. As with all matters of the heart, you'll know when you find it. And, like any great relationship, it just gets better and better as the years roll on. So keep looking until you find it. Don't settle.

My third story is about death.
When I was 17, I read a quote that went something like: "If you live each day as if it was your last, someday you'll most certainly be right." It made an impression on me, and since then, for the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: "If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?" And whenever the answer has been "No" for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.

Remembering that I'll be dead soon is the most important tool I've ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything – all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure - these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.

About a year ago I was diagnosed with cancer. I had a scan at 7:30 in the morning, and it clearly showed a tumor on my pancreas. I didn't even know what a pancreas was. The doctors told me this was almost certainly a type of cancer that is incurable, and that I should expect to live no longer than three to six months. My doctor advised me to go home and get my affairs in order, which is doctor's code for prepare to die. It means to try to tell your kids everything you thought you'd have the next 10 years to tell them in just a few months. It means to make sure everything is buttoned up so that it will be as easy as possible for your family. It means to say your goodbyes.

I lived with that diagnosis all day. Later that evening I had a biopsy, where they stuck an endoscope down my throat, through my stomach and into my intestines, put a needle into my pancreas and got a few cells from the tumor. I was sedated, but my wife, who was there, told me that when they viewed the cells under a microscope the doctors started crying because it turned out to be a very rare form of pancreatic cancer that is curable with surgery. I had the surgery and I'm fine now.

This was the closest I've been to facing death, and I hope its the closest I get for a few more decades. Having lived through it, I can now say this to you with a bit more certainty than when death was a useful but purely intellectual concept:

No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don't want to die to get there. And yet death is the destination we all share. No one has ever escaped it. And that is as it should be, because Death is very likely the single best invention of Life. It is Life's change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the new. Right now the new is you, but someday not too long from now, you will gradually become the old and be cleared away. Sorry to be so dramatic, but it is quite true.

Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma - which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of other's opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.

When I was young, there was an amazing publication called The Whole Earth Catalog, which was one of the bibles of my generation. It was created by a fellow named Stewart Brand not far from here in Menlo Park, and he brought it to life with his poetic touch. This was in the late 1960's, before personal computers and desktop publishing, so it was all made with typewriters, scissors, and polaroid cameras. It was sort of like Google in paperback form, 35 years before Google came along: it was idealistic, and overflowing with neat tools and great notions.

Stewart and his team put out several issues of The Whole Earth Catalog, and then when it had run its course, they put out a final issue. It was the mid-1970s, and I was your age. On the back cover of their final issue was a photograph of an early morning country road, the kind you might find yourself hitchhiking on if you were so adventurous. Beneath it were the words: "Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish." It was their farewell message as they signed off. Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish. And I have always wished that for myself. And now, as you graduate to begin anew, I wish that for you.

Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish.
Thank you all very much.

Long live Bachelors

Every man should get married some time; after all,happiness is not the only thing in life!!

--Anonymous

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Bachelors should be heavily taxed. It is not fair that some men should
be happier than others.

--Oscar Wilde


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Don't marry for money; you can borrow it cheaper.

--Scottish Proverb


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I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for
two years.

--Sam Kinison


----------------------------------------------------------------------
A psychiatrist is a person who will give you
expensive answers that your
wife will give you for free.

--Anonymous


---------------------------------------------------------------------
Men have a better time than women; for one thing,
they marry later; for
another thing, they die earlier.
--H. L. Mencken


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- "A man without a woman is like a fish without a
bicycle."
- U2


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- Marriage is a three-ring circus:
--engagement ring
---wedding ring
---suffering

---------------------------------------------------------------------
When a newly married couple smiles, everyone knows
why.
When a ten-year married couple smiles, everyone
wonders why.

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Love is blind but marriage is an eye-opener.

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When a man opens the door of his car for his wife,
you can be sure of
one thing: either the car is new or the wife.


---------------------------------------------------------------------
I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding
her way back to home always.

--Anonymous

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I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our
anniversary?" She said,"Somewhere I h! ave never been!" I told her,
"How about the kitchen?"

--Anonymous

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We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.

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My wife was in beauty saloon for two hours.
That was only for the estimate.

--Anonymous

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She got a mudpack and looked great for two days. Then
the mud fell off.

--Anonymous

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She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, "Am I too
late for the garbage?"
Following her down the street I yelled, "No, jump in."

--Anonymous

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Badd Teddy recently explained to me why he refuses
to get to married.
He says "the wedding rings look like minature
handcuffs....."

--Anonymous
---------------------------------------------------------------------
If your dog is barking at the back door and your
wife yelling at the frontdoor, who do you let in first?
The Dog of course... at least he'll shut up after u
let him in!

--Anonymous

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A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly
parted mother and started back toward his car when his attention was
diverted to another man kneeling at a grave. The man seemed to be
praying with profound intensity and kept repeating, 'Why did u have to
die? Why did you have to die?" The first man approached him and said, "Sir,
I don't wish to interfere with your private grief, but this
demonstration of pain in is
more than I've ever seen before. For whom do you mourn so? Deeply? A
child? A parent?"The mourner took a moment to collect himself, then
replied "My wife's first husband."

----------------------------------------------------------------------
A couple came upon a wishing well. The husband
leaned over, made a wish
and threw in a penny.
The wife decided to make a wish, too. But she leaned
over too much, fell
into the well, and drowned. The husband was stunned
for a while but then
smiled " It really works ! "

For Just Married Folks

The other day was sitting with a newly wed copule. Actually both were quite good friends of mine and unintentionally both of them said some things which reminded me of on joke in the forwarded mails that

What's the similarity between MOBILE and MARRIAGE -
In both cases you feel "aur thoda ruk jata to accha model milta"

Then I actually relized the jokes genrally we read are the real life incidents......

For Drinkers

One of my friends forwarded this nice mails for DRINKERS ....



Sometimes when I reflect back on all the beer I drink, I feel ashamed. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this beer, they might be out of work. Then their hopes and dreams would be
shattered. Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink this beer and let their dreams come true, than to be selfish and worry about my liver."

-- Jack Handy

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.

--Frank Sinatra

An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools.

--Ernest Hemingway

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.

--Henny Youngman

24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence?

--Stephen Wright

When we drink, we get drunk.
When we get drunk, we fall asleep.
When we fall asleep, we commit no sin.
When we commit no sin, we go to heaven.
Sooooo, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!

-- Brian O'Rourke

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
--Benjamin Franklin

CHEERRRRRRRSSSSSSSSSS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Risk

'Risk' owes its origin to the Italian word risicare that literally means 'to dare'

Colours of life - Choosing a life partner

Colours of life - Choosing a life partner

Choosing the right partner for marriage is so important an enterprise
that Shakespeare called it 'a world without end bargain'! It demands
the greatest prudence and caution. It is no place for cutting corners
or taking things for granted.

When selecting a marriage partner, one should look for certain
qualities to ensure happiness in marriage:

Religious compatibility: Religion colours one's whole outlook on
life. It provides incentives for much of your conduct. The greatest
treasure any person possesses is her/ his faith. With it one is rich,
without it poor. Where the faith is held in common, there is the
strongest possibility and guarantee of a successful marriage.

Character: Closely related to religion is moral character. Character
is basic among the qualities to be sought in a partner. It includes
disposition, temperament, attitudes and ethical standards. It is
vastly more important than appearance, social status and wealth. Moral
character penetrates to the roots of one's being. It is the
wellspring. Where issue important traits such as unselfishness,
honesty, kindness and integrity.

Health: Health of mind and body is another important requisite for a
happy marriage. It is vital for the proper discharge of one's duties
in marriage. When you marry you certainly do not want to marry a
doctor's bill.

Intellectual compatibility: Both the partners should be intellectually
compatible, so that there can be congenial companionship, sharing of
interests, exchange of thoughts and ideas.

Housekeeping: The partner you choose must find pride in the home, love
children, have a desire to find happiness in the family circle and to
make the home the centre of all activity. A good housekeeper is the
best home-maker.

Income: When you get married you cannot live on fresh air and
sunshine, for, while poverty enters by the door, love flies out of the
window. Therefore, when choosing a partner you must see to it that
your future spouse is both industrious and thrifty. It is said that a
fool and his money are soon parted.

A good disposition: A good disposition lubricates all family
relationships and makes a marriage tick. It means unselfishness,
tolerance, a forgiving spirit, empathy, understanding, consideration
for others, etc. If both parties have a good disposition they will
easily make all the adjustments which marital life requires.

Young people who contemplate marriage would do well to keep these
points in mind. If you do not make the right choice, your future
partner, instead of being the better half, will turn out to be your
bitter half. If you have had a frustrating courtship do not go ahead
with the marriage, or else, your fate will be like that of a certain
young woman, who despite a long and unsatisfying courtship, decided to
get married to the young man she was courting. At the altar, on the
wedding day, the celebrant asked her, "Do you take N. ..for better or
worse?" The young woman replied: "To be honest with you, Father, he
could not be worse and there is no hope of him being better, so I take
him as he is!" Within a short while, however, she ended up applying
for an annulment.

Dilbert Jokes: Out of Office Replies

Dilbert Jokes: Out of Office Replies
Some of the best of dilbert...

1: I am currently out at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to
get the position. Be prepared for my mood.

2: I'm not really out of the office. I'm just ignoring you.

3: You are receiving this automatic notification because I am out of the
office. If I was in, chances are you wouldn't have received anything at all.

4: Sorry to have missed you but I am at the doctors having my brain removed
so that I may be promoted to management

5: I will be unable to delete all the unread, worthless emails you send me
until I return from vacation on 4/18. Please be patient and your mail will
be deleted in the order it was received.

6: Thank you for your email. Your credit card has been charged $5.99 for the
first ten words and $1.99 for each additional word in your message.

7: The e-mail server is unable to verify your server connection and is
unable to deliver this message. Please restart your computer and try sending
again.'

(The beauty of this is that when you return, you can see how many
in-duh-viduals did this over and over).

8: Thank you for your message, which has been added to a queueing system.
You are currently in 352nd place, and can expect to receive a reply in
approximately 19 weeks.

9: Please reply to this e-mail so I will know that you got this message. I
am on holiday. Your e-mail has been deleted.

10: Hi. I'm thinking about what you've just sent me. Please wait by your PC
for my response.

11: Hi! I'm busy negotiating the salary for my new job. Don't bother to
leave me any messages.

12: I've run away to join a different circus. ... "

10 Ways of Marrying The Wrong Person

Somebody just forwarded this mail...

10 Ways of Marrying The Wrong Personby Rabbi Dov Heller, M.A.

1. You pick the wrong person because you expect him/her to change after
you're married. The classic mistake: Never marry potential. The golden rule
is, if you can't be happy with the person the way he or she is now, don't
get married. As a colleague of mine so wisely put it, "You actually can
expect people to change after they're married... for the worst!" So when it
comes to the other person's spirituality, character, personal hygiene,
communication skills, and personal habits, make sure you can live with these
as they are now.

2. You pick the wrong person because you focus more on chemistry than on
character. Chemistry ignites the fire, but good character keeps it burning.
Beware of the "I'm in love" syndrome. "I'm in love" often means, "I'm in
lust." Attraction is there, but have you carefully checked out this person's
character? Here are four character traits to definitely check for:

Humility: Does this person believe that "doing the right thing" is more
important than personal comfort? Do I want to be more like this person?
Would I like my child to turn out like him or her?

Kindness: Does this person enjoy giving pleasure to other people? How does
s/he treat people s/he doesn't have to be nice to? Does s/he do volunteer
work? Give charity?

Responsibility: Can I depend on this person to do what s/he says s/he's
going to do?

Happiness: Does this person like himself? Does s/he enjoy life? Is s/he
emotionally stable? Ask yourself: Do I want to be more like this person? Do
I want to have a child with this person? Would I like my child to turn out
like him or her?

3. You pick the wrong person because the man doesn't understand what a woman
needs most. Men and women have unique emotional needs, and more often than
not, it is the man who just doesn't "get it." Jewish tradition places the
onus on the man to understand the emotional needs of a woman and to satisfy
them. The unique need of a woman is to be loved -- to feel that she is the
most important person in her husband's life. The husband needs to give her
consistent, quality attention. This is most apparent in Judaism's approach
to sexual intimacy. The Torah obligates the husband to meet the sexual needs
of his wife. Sexual intimacy is always on the woman's terms. Men are
goal-oriented, especially when it comes to this area. As a wise
woman once pointed out, "Men have two speeds: on and off." Women are
experience-oriented. When a man is able to switch gears and become more
experience-oriented, he will discover what makes his wife very happy. When
the man forgets about his own needs and focuses on giving his wife pleasure,
amazing things happen.

4. You choose the wrong person because you do not share a common life goals
and priorities. There are three basic ways we connect with another person:

-chemistry and compatibility
-share common interests
-share common life goal

Make sure you share the deeper level of connection that sharing life goals
provide. After marriage, the two of you will either grow together or grow
apart. To avoid growing apart, you must figure out what you're "living for,"
while you're single -- and then find someone who has come to the same
conclusion as you. This is the true definition of a "soul mate." A soul mate
is a goal mate -- two people who ultimately share the same understanding of
life's purpose and therefore share the same priorities, values and goals.

5. You choose the wrong person because you get involved sexually too
quickly. Sexual involvement before the commitment of marriage can be a big
problem because it often precludes a fully honest exploration of important
issues. Sexual involvement tends to cloud one's mind. And a clouded mind is
not inclined to make good decisions. Of all the studies done on divorce,
sexual incompatibility is never cited as a main factor. It is not necessary
to take a "test drive" in order to find out if a couple is sexually
compatible. If you do your homework and make sure you are intellectually and
emotionally compatible, you don't have to worry about sexualcompatibility.
Of all the studies done on divorce, sexual incompatibility is never citedas
a main reason why people divorce.

6. You pick the wrong person because you do not have a deeper emotional
connection with this person. To evaluate whether you have a deeper emotional
connection or not, ask: "Do I respect and admire this person?" This does not
mean, "Am I impressed by this person?" We are impressed by a Mercedes. We do
not respect someone because they own a Mercedes. You should be impressed by
qualities of creativity, loyalty, determination, etc. Also ask: "Do I trust
this person?" This also means, "Is he/she emotionally stable? Do I feel I
can rely on him/her?

7. You pick the wrong person because you choose someone with whom you don't
feel emotionally safe. Ask yourself the following questions: Do I feel calm,
peaceful and relaxed with this person? Can I fully express myself with this
person? Does this person make me feel good about myself? Do you have a
really close friend who does make you feel this way? Make sure the person
you marry makes you feel the same way! Are you afraid of this person in any
way? You should not feel you need to monitor what you say because you are
afraid of how the other person will view it. If you're afraid to express
your feelings and opinions openly, there's a problem with the relationship.
Be on the look out for someone who is always trying to change you. Another
aspect of feeling safe is that you don't feel the other person is trying to
control you. Controlling behaviors are a sign of
an abusive person. Be on the look out for someone who is always trying to
change you. There's a big difference between "controlling" and "making
suggestions." A suggestion is made for your benefit; a control statement is
made for their benefit.

8. You pick the wrong person because you don't put everything on the table.
Anything that bothers you about the relationship must be brought up for
discussion. Bringing up the uncomfortable stuff is the only way. To evaluate
how well the two of you communicate, negotiate, and work together. Over the
course of a lifetime, difficulties will inevitably arise. You need to know
now, before making a commitment: Can you resolve your differences and find
compromises that work for both of you? Never be afraid to let the person
know what bothers you. This is also a way for you to test how vulnerable you
can be with this person. If you can't be vulnerable, then you can't be
intimate. The two go hand in hand.

9. You pick the wrong person because you use the relationship to escape from
personal problems and unhappiness. If you are unhappy and single,you'll
probably be unhappy and married, too. Marriage does not fix personal,
psychological and emotional problems. If anything, marriage will exacerbate
them. If you are not happy with yourself and your life, take responsibility
to fix it now while you are single. You'll feel better, and your future
spouse will thank you.

10. You pick the wrong person because he/she is involved in a triangle. To
be "triangulated" means a person is emotionally dependent on someone or
something else while trying to develop another relationship. A person who
hasn't separated from his or her parents is the classic example of
triangulation. People can also be triangulated with things as well, such as
work, drugs, Internet, hobbies, sports or money. Be careful that you and
your partner are free of triangles. The person caught in the triangle cannot
be fully emotionally available to you. You will not be their number
one priority. And that's no basis for a marriage.

More Dilbert's Principles

http://vickyboss.blogspot.com/2005/02/more-dilberts-principles.html